So.... I'm trying not to bore everyone with my woes at the moment, so thought I'd pop in here and have a bit of a whinge. That way, I'm only boring those who WANT to be bored...
Actually, several of the wonderful staff at The Mater have told me that my current malaise is entirely natural! I keep trying to focus on the positive... i.e. the rapidly approaching end of treatment, but I seem to be having more down days than I have throughout this whole crapshoot. Apparently, that's normal! I HATE being normal.... always been one to try and buck the trend.... (Actually that's crap, I'm one of the most boring people I know!) I seem to be in tears 3 or 4 times a day, for no apparent reason, someone just said something nice to me on Twitter and my eyes are leaking all over the place. (Don't let that stop you saying something nice though).
Anywhooo, apart from the mental/emotional meltdown, I do have some physical issues I'm dealing with. The radiation has burnt my skin, let's just say in "the treatment area". No need to get too graphic, you all know where my cancer is. It's painful, it's uncomfortable, it means I've had to wear a bra 24 hours a day for the last few weeks .... it just FKN HURTS!!!! I see the Doc today after my treatment, and am hoping that he doesn't suggest taking time out to allow for some healing. I'd really rather just get it over with.
6 comments:
I think you're handling things pretty well, all things considered. Cancer is a rough go. Not sure how well I'd do given your circumstances.
Yeah, I think you're amazingly brave. All this very much upsets me. Apart from being reasonably close to home with the missus' health stuff it just does my heart in with you, Doc, and Al. You're all young, and none of you are bastards. You're all great, and give me more time than I probably deserve. All I can do is cheer you on when and if you need it from my end.
Big thoughts.
Thanks guys! Only 4 treatments to go...
I really am trying to keep my sense of humour, as well as a sense of perspective. Sometimes it gets a bit hard though. Thanks for being there and not slapping me down when I get a bit cranky.
Hey Mayhem. Read this today and thought immediately of you. The Barnes's of the world will accuse me of quackery, and I have to say, I'm not generally given to it myself, but this article does make a lot of sense.
I recently had a duck down - a lame duck, in fact, and the old livestock book I consult suggested it might be botulism. Anyhoo - the remedy was to dissolve Epsom salts in water and feed it to the duck. In three days he was up and about again, so obviously it can be taken orally.
Made me think that there might be a lot more to this old remedy than meets the eye. So, have a read. Perhaps it might help in your recovery and possibly alleviate the effects of the therapy.
NB: Magnesium sulphate is cheap and available from the supermarket, Magnesium chloride is NOT safe to humans but Mg sulphate can be administered intravenously. Either way, it can't hurt you. And besides, an Epsom salts bath is a bit of luxury you can afford and might help your soothe your burns.
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?sk=group_154703801248090&view=doc&id=164468273604976
Lady Mayhem, the brave. I am totally in awe of your acceptance, your strength, you honesty, and your pragmatism - not to mention that sassy blonde hair!
I wish we could have caught up during your week down here. I made you some biscotti. Never mind, it won't go to waste. I.e, I've eaten half of it already. Mmmmm... biscotti...
Meanwhile, let yourself wallow if you need to. There's no harm in letting it out, but lots of harm in bottling it up. Go ahead, have all the whine you want - and you know where I am if you want cheese with it.
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